Archive for September, 2009

My abusive-life style in a nut-shell

Making the best of a bad situation

Making the best of a bad situation

I am a mother, grandmother, author of two books, ” The Lives of Abused and Battered Women ” which can be purchased at http://www.amazon.com , http://www.barnes&noble.com,  http://www.buybooksontheweb.com for $9.95, and ” Heart-Boosting Poetry” can be purchased at http://www.publishamerica.comhttp://www.amazon.com , and http://www.barnes&noble.com for $12.95 . As a child I loved to play with dolls, doing their hair, as I got older I tried to sing. I wanted to be able to sing to touch the hearts of others deep down in their souls, I guess it wasn’t meant to be. Later I watched people that were going through trials from deaths in the family, and break ups in relationships. I wrote things down pertaining to the situation. As I entered the work force I began to write poems for my co-workers that were having problems with their mates or what ever the trials may have been. My relationships for about twenty five years was mainly abusive ones. The cold harsh words of being told that no one would want me but for one thing took a lot out of me.  The lies, cheating, and fighting was by no means fun, but I stayed there. I lowered my standards all for the hopes of truly being loved and wanted. Unfortunatedly that never happened.

After all of those years I realized that I was better than that and deserved to be treated differently. I put my foot down and said that enough was enough. I could say that I was worth more than a cup of coffee and a doughnut. I decided that I didn’t need anyone in my life that could do less for me than I could do for myself. I began to stand up for my rights and decided that if in a relationship and my life hadn’t changed for the better in a short period of time, I was gone. I would not lower my standards for anyone ever again, if they come up to my level I refused to go down to theirs. I put my life and heart into my books to be a blessing to others due to abuse, friendship, self respect, self love, sister to sister love, and hope for a brighter tommorrow.

Hold or Fold?

When trying to promote your work if all of your resources are at a screaching low; and it seems that there’s no help in site, would you give up or hold on believing that one day your day will come?

Barbara

The Biggest Case Scenario of Abuse

The Biggest Case Scenario to the continuation of  “The Lives of Abused and Battered Women”
 
    Men have gotten by with abusing women for centuries. When the first man got by with it I feel that it gave the other men the nerve to abuse their women also. If the men had been judged, or condemned for their actions this would never have lasted this long. At the first sign of abuse, if we women would have stood up for our rights, or did what ever it took to show the men that they had picked the wrong person to jump on they would have bowed down like an humble puppy. When they (men) jumped at us or did something to hurt us we should have shown them that our bark and bite was just as fierce. Men will run from another man for fear of getting the beat down, but turn their manliness on women.
    It’s long over due time for women to do what ever it takes with in reason to protect ourselves. No more being criticized, abused or belittled. It’s time for us to take our lives back. We have to let it be known that the abusive life style is not acceptable. It’s time for us to stop feeling sorry for those heartless men that torment us. It’s time to see ourselves as beautiful, special, rare, and a unique, and a precious work of God. Stop looking down on yourselves because a man or anyone else tells you that no one will want you. Always have hope in the midst of your storm. “Never let your left hand know what your right hand is doing”.
    It’s been said that we should give ways of escape or a solution. People can give us all of the ways to get away, or the money that is needed to do it but if we haven’t made up in our minds that enough is enough we still want do anything. God gave us our lives to live to the fullest of our ability. No one has the right to treat us the way that they have. These words are from my heart and I pray that I haven’t offended anyone because that is not my intention. My heart and my prayers are with you. It took me twenty five years to realize that I was better than I was being treated and I decided to walk away. You have to be the judge of how much is enough. The longer we take the harsh treatment, the longer they will dish it out.
    The cold hard truth is that the reason that the men have constantly abused us is that we kept it a secret. We swept it under the rug until it made a lump, then it turned into a mold hill, and the final phase became a mountain that was too hard to climb. The men did it because we didn’t let anyone know what they were doing. I asked why God allowed this to continue to happen and it hit me, God gave us many warnings and we kept accepting the mess. We got through that hurdle and thought that everything would be okay, then it got a little worse. Each time God kept saying “I’m giving you a reason to get out, and you keep finding reasons to stay”. Abuse is not just in the low class minority of women, it’s in the middle class and the high class minority of women also. It’s not just in a certain place or region it’s world wide. Whether we keep it a secret or not; we know and God knows.
    At the first sign of abuse, or that something wasn’t right we should have walked then and never gave it a second thought to look back. If you’re being abused don’t keep it a secret, that only makes it worse. Shout it out on the roof top, on the mountain, and all through the valley. At least you would have made a start. If we as women would pray for a change for the better of our sisters, not just one of us but all women over the world I truly believe that a change will surely come. “I Love You My Sister.” The greatest love of all, other than the love of God is self love.
Barbara

Never give up

Keep the faith”

When  all of the trials of this old world seem to come upon you like a mighty rushing wind, don’t give up, don’t lose hope, get up, brush the dust off of yourself and try again. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. What doesn’t kill you gives you the means to become stronger and better at the next test that you should be faced with.

Barbara

You are special my dear.

You are so special my dear

You are so very special my dear.

I pray that you don’t allow my words to go past your ear.

There is a blessing in my words for you to hear.

If you should happen to break down and cry,

 I pray that my words will dry up your every tear.

I pray that  God will be with you so you’ll have nothing to fear.

I pray that this is your due season and that you’ll be blessed this year.

Walk  in the front, there’s no need to linger in the rear.

I pray that your miracle will soon appear.

You are worthy and truly special my dear

Barbara

Is my striving in vain?

“”Is my striving in vain?”
Dear Lord here I am once again.
I feel that my faith is as small as a grain.
My heart feels the pain.
I need you to back me and be my anchor or cane.
Open that door for me that seems so hard to open,
nothing has come to me as though I don’t have a brain.
I feel weighted down by a heavy crane.
Dear Lord, show the world that I’m not some dizzy or dumb dane.
Guard my heart as I stare through that empty window pane.
The pressure is enough to drive one in sain.
I would like to know if my striving is in vain.
Barbara